One time on a SWISS flight from Zurich to New York, I started crying. I’d been grieving, but felt fine when I boarded the plane. Nevertheless, not long after take off, I was sobbing uncontrollably, silently, but unable to stop. That went on for hours, until the purser retrieved me from my economy seat (the poor man next to me!) — and moved me to business class, complete with a chamomile tea. That helped, just saying. Planes, with their lower oxygen levels, can trigger tears which pour from our eyes for a slew of reasons — from sadness to empathy to anger. But legions of other things can prompt breakdowns. Massages, for instance. During a treatment of any kind, emotional releases can occur. Purportedly this happens when a skilled practitioner’s experienced movements free feelings — trapped deeply in tight muscles. I’ve wailed after Reiki treatments, bawled during yoga, whimpered when having a conversation with a total stranger who said just the right thing, words I would have never heard had I not traveled to a certain place at a certain time. (That’s what Jung calls synchronicity.) Perhaps, too, it happens because we’ve allowed ourselves to be vulnerable, unwinding to the ministrations of a trusted human. Sometimes that can seem as serious as life or death.
A beautiful view might launch weeping, as might a pampering hotel made safe with deliberate quietude, kind staff, and programs meant to support what you’re going through — whether a need to forgive or a way to find gratitude, whether you’re looking for meaning, pursuing a decision, or drawing a line under something in the past to move forward. Sometimes we cry when we stay in a coddling hotel alone because it is the first time we’ve slowed down or been solo long enough to have a conversation with our inner selves. Sometimes we don’t even know that we’re hurting — until the tears begin to flow. We’ve trapped those baleful feelings so far down in our soul, they’re stuck growing more deleterious by the minute. Often we don’t have the ability to give ourselves the permission we need to heal — or to cry, an act experts say releases endorphins and oxytocin, mood improving chemicals. Simply said, shedding tears is cathartic.
So, if you need a good cry, if you’re willing to let the tears flow, a range of unique retreats and experiences can help make that healing release happen. We’ve rounded up some of our favorites below.
The Retreat at Blue Lagoon Iceland, Iceland
The adage, “Be like water,” attributed to Bruce Lee as a reminder to stay fluid, open, and resilient, remains one of the best mantras for day-to-day survival. Add in the studies showing that being in or around water relieves stress, boosts the immune system, lowers blood pressure, and refreshes us. So it makes sense that soaking in water at The Retreat at Blue Lagoon Iceland might take us to the finish line in any quest to spark change and relinquish our sorrows. Drown them in the upscale spa resort’s milky lagoons, cry into the mineral-rich water, let the ancient lava fields touch your soul. Moved by the terrain, revived by the water’s gifts, and nourished in the restaurants, you’ll shed tears of bliss for taking the plunge.
Palmaia The House of AIA, Mexico
The owners of Palmaia: The House of AIA want you to sob — with the delight of ridding bad habits and adopting new ways to embrace joy. Their goal is to give you options, to present you with myriad pathways to enhance your life, lessons to recalibrate your spirit, and experiences to sate your curiosity. A plant-based retreat and all-inclusive getaway with five restaurants, Palmaia harbors guilt-free hedonism. That might mean all the green juice and vegan tacos you can consume or just as many margaritas and a meat dish. It could mean sleeping on the beach all day in a lounge chair or going from class to practice learning new things from a shaman. It might mean time in the spa. As things reset, as you find yourself willing to change — even a little bit — the tears will come. Know this: they won’t be in vain.
Four Seasons Rancho Encantado, New Mexico
Nestled in the Sangre de Cristo Mountains with mystical traditions that date back thousands of years to the Pueblo people, unique Santa Fe perennially attracts those on a quest. Abundant with healers of various modalities, the city exudes an invitation to possibility. Set on its verges on 57 acres, Four Seasons Resort Rancho Encantado Santa Fe beckons. Its mystical spa, poised on a spiritual vortex, offers a plentitude of treatments likely to make you weep. But sometimes it takes an animal interaction to spark a purifying cry. Booked through the resort’s Adventure Center the EQUUS Experience partners guests with a trained herd of horses and Pueblo member Thunder Bear Yates for horse whispering therapy and lessons in the Pueblo way.
We Care Spa, California
At We Care Spa in Desert Hot Springs near Palm Springs, you may think you’ll cry because you’re hungry. But the tranquil sanctum, known for its guided fasting and holistic spa treatments, keeps you well sated with its 12 different teas, pressed juices, shakes, soups, and water. At We Care, which occupies 20 acres of dramatic desertscape, your body has the opportunity to take a break from digesting solid foods, allowing the body to fight stress, toxins, and sick cells. This also eases participants into a state of mindfulness, a hyper awareness supported by breathwork, meditation, sound bowl sessions, and spa treatments. Tears at We Care will be part of the detox process — and soon become tears of joy.
Schloss Elmau, Germany
Sometimes nature simply leads us to the cure. When a retreat’s surroundings have so much gravitas they act as a mirror that reflects our inner selves, we simply go deeper. Our hearts can open; our spirits can renew. Such a place is Schloss Elmau, which overlooks the grandeur of the Bavarian Alps’ Wetterstein Mountains. An elegant hotel that knows its landscape sets the tone, the castle-like estate buoys up the sad and hurting, helps the lost to pivot, and feeds all of the senses in a reminder that life is worth the tough fight. With six spas, open air pools, brooks to paddle, paths to hike, and daily yoga, Schloss Elmau might spark sobs when it’s time to go home.
Grand Wailea, A Waldorf Astoria Resort, Maui
Bring repressed emotions to the surface at Maui’s Grand Wailea, A Waldorf Astoria Resort during a purging “E Ala E” sunrise ritual. Under the tutelage of Maui native and Cultural Director Kalei ‘Uwēko’olani, you’ll immerse in ancient Hawaiian history and traditions as you let the past go to welcome new horizons with the rising sun. Kalei’s fortifying, beachside ceremony helps participants delve deeply within to cast away anxieties and heartache, metaphorically releasing them to the ocean. Emerging revitalized, guests take part in the grand finale: a traditional Hawaiian oli chant that solidifies the experience and refuels the soul.
Horse Shoe Farm, North Carolina
Described as woo woo with a dose of Southern hospitality, this 85-acre luxury farm hotel in Hendersonville near Asheville (a destination often called the “Sedona of the South”), lies amongst ley lines and vortexes aplenty. In fact, five ley lines serve as the foundation of the property, with one situated just below the horse-stable-turned-spa. (Note: that’s where you’re most likely to weep, if you’re anything like us.) With cottages and suites, farm-to-table fare, and treatments that include such joyfully cathartic, tear-jerking moments as astrology readings and spirit readings where they truly discern your essence, intuitive energy rituals, and Innerdance (an immersive sound-based treatment), the soulful hotel can change lives. Up next: the boutique farm has partnered with Yona FrenchHawk, a full-blooded Cherokee wisdom keeper and ceremonialist to build a sweat lodge on property and be the host of community ceremonies each full and new moon.
Jumeirah Al Qasr, Dubai
Already conveying travelers by magic carpet to fantastical reality, Dubai’s majestic Jumeirah Al Qasr seems quixotic — an ideal place to step forward into the future and redefine your life. Its famous Talise Spa has unveiled a customizable multi-day De Stress program . Available in 3-, 5- or 7-day itineraries, the wellness foray can include practices such as Emotion and Body Code EFT — which tests and releases energetic frequencies to release anxiety, stress, and trauma, Pranayama, and meditation. Via a Sartori Wellness Lounger, guests can experiment with vibroacoustic therapy (VAT) which treats stress with music and vibrations or indulge in the Voyager Massage, which reproduces the soothing rhythms of the sea. Internal wellbeing with integrative nutrition and health coaching ensures guests have a road map to continue their self care at home.
Featured image courtesy of Grand Wailea, A Waldorf Astoria Resort
